5 Ways to Raise a Compassionate Child

If you're anything like me, the overwhelming job of being a mom might seem harder than ever these days. Not only do we worry about our children's everyday experiences, we also worry about the state of our country. We feel angered by the stories of inequality and filled with sadness and worry over violence - especially in schools. Sometimes, we feel like we are drowning in tragic headlines and negative social media posts. If this is our reality as parents, then think of the impact on our children spending their formative years in a world that sadly doesn't make sense to any of us.

There has never been a more important time to combat the pervasive negativity in our daily lives that threatens to beat us all down into inertia and apathy. Fortunately, as parents, we have the power to change this by doing everything possible to raise a compassionate child. If our children learn to make decisions that are based in compassion, then we can know that we are raising children who will make a difference in the world.
Here are 5 things you can do to raise a compassionate child:

1. Be an activist for the issues you care about.

The best way to to teach your child compassion is to let them see you living it yourself. If you want your child to know the importance of voting and using our voices to help others, then take them with you when you vote and explain your voting choices to them. If you want your child to be a helper, then let them see the ways that you help others. If you want your child to stand up for others, take them with you to a family friendly march or meeting or opportunity to serve where they can see you using your voice.
Obviously, it's important to make sure events are age appropriate, but I've found that if I spend time talking with my children about the related issues before the event and make sure to frame what they hear at the event in a way that highlights compassion as a theme, then they can walk away from the experience with important lessons. I think very often we take the step to talk about important issues that require compassion to understand, but we often forget to show our children how we can take action via our compassion as well.

2. Do community service and volunteer work with your children.

There is no better way to develop compassion than to serve others, and these days, there are so many opportunities for families to help others together. Often, we know that there will be a school, club, or church requirement that will get our children to do volunteer work at some point, but if we can help our children start early and see community service as a way of life rather than a means to an end, then we can highlight the power of compassion even more. Helping our children understand that serving the community and volunteering to help others is part of our civic duty will also help them to appreciate the power of community and compassion on several levels.
Although there are often advertised volunteer opportunities surrounding the holidays, try to also find service opportunities throughout the entire year. In the viewpoints of young children that often developmentally see the world in black and white ways, we want children to understand that compassion and service are not things that we suddenly whip out at the holidays and when responding to major disasters and tragedies, as important as those times are. We want to emphasize that compassion and service to others should always be a part of our lives.

3. Discuss what's happening in the news with children.

This is often a difficult thing for parents to do because we worry about how to talk about big issues with our children, and we fear that we may scare them by bringing up challenging topics. I personally like to have the opportunity to frame the discussion on current events rather than waiting for my children to hear about it themselves via a headline or through someone else's viewpoint. I don't share gratuitous details, but I do let them know about situations of injustice or where people are suffering. I also make sure to share how people are helping in these situations, and especially how we can help.
It's not always clear how we can help in big ways, but I want my children to understand that there is always something that we can do, and that no attempt to help is ever too small. Whether they mail a card to a victim, include those who are suffering in a bedtime prayer, or whether we talk about what we can do now to prevent something like this from happening again, the most important thing for me is to connect feelings of compassion about difficult issues with instances of action.

4. Travel with your children.

Whenever possible, try to travel with your children. The smaller the world feels to children, the more connected they will feel to the world around them. Understanding that they are members of a global community drives compassion and can take away the misunderstanding that people who do not look like them or do not live nearby do not have thoughts and feelings just like they do. It is a wonderful bonus if you can do some volunteer work as a family during your travels as well.
Although I'm sure many of us would love to travel the globe with our children, that is not always feasible. Still we can travel to far away places in books and through movies. We can find a pen pal in another part of the world or the country. We can visit an area that is not far from our home via car, bus, or train that presents a different lifestyle or culture to our children. Whether you travel as a family in body or in imagination, help your child to see the world through someone else's eyes.

5. Bring discussion about compassion and kindness into your daily life.

It isn’t always an easy job to learn about how your child’s day went when you see them after school. Questions like, “How was your day?” typically don’t get you very far. You can kill two birds with one stone when you focus on compassion and kindness. Asking your child questions like, “What is one example of a time you were kind or showed compassion today?” will let your child know that this is important to your family and give you the opportunity to have meaningful conversations at the same time.
After a little while of doing this, you will find that your child may start looking for compassion and kindness opportunities on her own and will start to volunteer information about her day to day experiences in your after school conversations.
Doing what you can to raise a compassionate child benefits your family relationships and the world around you. As parents, we have the power to shape the next generation of voters, leaders, and helpers. Let’s do all we can to make the most of this superpower!
Comment below to let us know how you encourage your children to be compassionate!